Monaco
I also spent a day in Monaco. It was a kind of whimsical “I should hop on the train and go someplace” moment that you can only have while traveling in Europe. I got there for only 3 euro. It was either Monaco or take the train to go skiing in the alps. Not that I even know how to ski, it was just not very expensive, and something that’d make a good story at cocktail parties. When I am faced with choices like that I want to punch myself in the face I feel so privileged. As trite and condescending as it sounds I actually get jealous of myself. I feel though that I make up for it a little bit by really appreciating my experiences. And I certainly appreciated Monaco.
For me Monaco was like being in a James Bond film for a day. It was a day in which multimillion-dollar yachts surrounded me, I saw more exotic and luxury cars in an hour than in all my life, went inside the Monte-Carlo Casino, and did all this in the company of a beautiful Brazilian girl. Not bad for a day eh? I’ll elaborate a bit further.
First the girl, Anna, just happened to be traveling from Nice (where she was staying for a few days) to Monaco on a similar whim feeling. We met on the train and formed a random insta-friendship along with Josh (the American actor, or Ax2) after realizing that all three of us were sat in a row reading phrase books and opted to check out this unknown city together. I’m really glad we did too because for one it added much more of an element of fun, but also she spoke way more French than Josh or I and was able to translate for us in a pinch.
Monaco was gorgeous but in the “too rich for my blood” sense of the term. Even the overpasses above streets had escalators rather than stairs. Outdoor escalators for the public, who even does that? The bay was filled with yachts that looked to be the size of a cruise liner. We ogled a few particularly nice ones, but there were also the cars. Monaco it seems is a play ground for Ferrari, Lamborghini, Bentleys, and the like. The everyday street was like a car show. Were I actually into cars I’d be in heaven.
This place is like the Beverly Hill’s of the world. And this is because, well besides being gorgeous, Monaco is a tax haven. The State has no income tax for individuals so wealthy “tax refugee” residents from European countries flock here. This includes a lot of F1 drivers but also because the Grad Prix is held here. (Perhaps another reason for all the nice cars.)
One of the highlights of Monaco is the Monte Carlo Casino, which I’m sure has been in at least one Bond film. Having never been in a casino I was really happy that this one was my first (and probably only) because it fulfilled the stereotype of what kind of casino 007 would go to. In the evening there is a black tie dress code and the minimum chips are like $30. $30 just to sit at the table… can you imagine that? During the day though it’s a little bit less formal and I managed to get in with my blazer and button up shirt. But even then you have to give them your passport to enter. I’m glad I did it though, because I got to see the extremely fancy luxury of the casino, with its tuxedoed staff, outrageously priced drinks, and old business men smoking cigars and betting away more money than I’ve ever earned. I was hoping to be a fly on the wall but I’m pretty sure it was obvious that I didn’t belong there. Probably because I couldn’t help but hum in my head: bon doont dun don dun dun na.
But my favorite part of Monaco (which is why I know I wouldn’t fit in there) wasn’t the Palace, or the imposing yachts, or the Prada stores, or Night Clubs that 50 Cent or Justin Timberlake frequent, or anything like that. It was ice skating in the middle of the town and drinking hot chocolate afterwards. Or just taking in the pure beauty of the water there. As beautiful as the water in Nice was, it is even more so in Monaco. Even the harbor water that houses all these fancy yachts was so pure. Normally with all the boat traffic this type of water looks oily or dirty, but in Monaco I was temped to drink it, it was so spotless. Words just can’t describe it, and I’m sure pictures just don’t do it justice.
All and all it was a great end to a great trip. I visited 3 countries in 6 days, not to shabby at all! The next morning I had to be up early to catch the flight back home. It’s a wired feeling to leave your holiday and head back to home when home is England. It’s more like a holiday inside of a holiday really. It was also interesting to enter back into England feeling completely comfortable and not like a tourist or foreigner. Even if England is about 20 degrees colder…
Monaco footnotes…
Don’t feel bad if you didn’t know this, before I went I didn’t either: Monaco is the world’s most densely populated country and second-smallest independent nation; with an area of just under 500 acres. (I thought I was just part of France, it’s not, it’s independent). It’s currently ruled by Prince Albert II who isn’t in a can, but is the son of Grace Kelly. She met the late Prince Rainier III in her acting hay-day way back when and gave up acting to be a Princess in Monaco. I don’t blame her at all.
P.S. They speak French here…

December 24th, 2007 at 10:35 pm
I completely understand. Some of my best travel moments have been open air ice-skating. We don’t have a lot of that here in Australia, so when I travel that’s usually the first thing I look for. Brilliant! Absolutely Brilliant. Sounds like you had a great time . . .completely jealous. Only hot chocolate experience to rival that is when I was punting along the Avon in Christchurch - New Zealand where you drink hot chocolate as you’re being taken down this beautiful river. A must try.
December 26th, 2007 at 7:18 am
I miss you my friend. That is all.
December 26th, 2007 at 7:21 am
Wait a second. That ISN’T all! I am glad you are having a wonderful time in all your travels. Yes. Now, that is all.
December 28th, 2007 at 6:18 pm
Mr. O! It is nice to have a way to get in touch with you! Yes, this is The RuSS. Remember me at all? huh Mr. Bigshot?!? lol jk Hope you make the east suffer! lol wb anytime man. always welcome! :-))
January 2nd, 2008 at 7:42 pm
I took this one to work and my coworkers loved it. So many beautiful things to see. I’m glad you appricate the simple things as well as the grand. Love mom
January 10th, 2008 at 10:48 pm
Great writings my friend. But HOW DARE YOU. Scrubs stole our nicknames from us, not the other way round.
It’s really great having Brandon over and hanging out with him, he’s a great guy with similar humour to ours and it gives us a chance to have a bit of a culture for once and not be the usual neanderthals lol. He inspires us to do more too. Eg, he organised a few games of rugby (which resulted in me breaking two ribs and Nath (Brown Bear) having to have an operation to remove a main vein in his leg- good times!). We did get him back by taking him camping to the mountains, where it rained non-stop for four days and the wind howled 60-70 mph winds. Hopefully we’ll be over to Seattle after Brandon returns (If we let him, that is!).
January 11th, 2008 at 3:40 pm
hey ice skating is just the best,sailing around at high speed,pretending to fall and grabing attractive fellow skate chiks for stability.wish vanilla bear and i had been there to see those flash motors too.So yankee bear we need more details of this horrific camping trip,and pics of the camo leg wear.
January 14th, 2008 at 8:12 am
hey chum. i just had to share w/you that i read your travel stories all at once while awake at 3 am in my best friend’s double wide in dahlonega, georgia (dah-lawn-neg-ga) AKA small town in the dirty south). i can’t sleep because she has this CAT that not only stinks up the trailer, but that attacked my wrist when it slid off the couch. its swollen up so bad i am contemplating waking her and her redneck up to take me to the ER. in addition, the CAT stares at me when i try to sleep which has kept me awake. then i read of your travels and you couldn’t possibly feel any further away than right at this moment. i miss you. maybe i’ll see you before you return?
February 27th, 2008 at 3:50 pm
Romy: Are you in England yet? Still want to go to Prague?
Krista: I miss you too! Sell you liver and move here.
Russ: Thanks man, it’s good to hear from you too. You should send me a proper email sometime and let me know how your life is.
Mom: Thank you as always for the shameless promotion of your son’s endeavors.
Chris and Nath: I think perhaps you tow should have your own blog site? And I’ll post pictures and stories of camping soon. But nothing about the camo-long-johns I was wearing… that stays between you few lucky enough to see it.
And Randee: What are you doing in the peach state? Visiting Ludicrous and his posse? And yeah, I hear you and Natalie may come this spring… is this true?